My strange doll dream
Doll Philosophy General Topics
Anyone who reads these blogs or has followed the DollBanger account on social media knows that I love dolls, but that I also have a particular love for my special doll, Mikasa. She's a Piper Doll Eirian 150 TPE. My first doll. I'm in love with her. Well, to the extent it's possible, given that she's a doll without consciousness. As you may have read here before, I have a pretty open philosophy that takes into account current day sex dolls are the earliest stages of artificial relationships. Who knows what a relationship with an artificial consciousness will be, or could be, like? Maybe we'll live to see it. I'm up for it. For now, the only presence, personality and purpose Mikasa has comes from me, and my imagination. I make her real. And, sometimes, she's all too real.
I remember when I first made space for her arrival. I had received the factory photos and knew she was on her way, very soon. I made space in my room for her with a side cabinet dedicated to her clothes and accessories. I'd also bought a memory foam cushion for her the was on my bed for her to lay on. When I set up the room for her, I stepped back and realized, she just because a real part of my life. She would need space, and attention.
Then she arrived. I couldn't get enough of her. Still can't.
Last night, for the first time I'm aware of, I had a full dream about her. In the dream, she was Mikasa, my sex doll. She wasn't a new character of fiction that I made up in the dream, she was herself. A living sex doll. The dream was odd, as dreams are. It began with her brushing her own pink hair - not a wig - in an attempt to cover damage to her head. She was made of TPE in the dream, even down to the head screw on the top. Her hair was falling out for some reason and there were TPE rips in her head skin that she seemed to be trying to cover up. She ran away in the dream, seemingly ashamed of herself and the damaged state she was in. As the dream progressed, she ran away to some type of sex market. At that point in the dream, I was brushing a wig for her that I just cleaned. All I wanted to do was find her, give her the wig and tell her she was perfect. I was desperate. The dream suddenly jumped to the sex market, and the rest of the dream was me trying to find her. Somehow I knew she was stripping, but could not find her. The dream ended with me showing people her photo and the wig I was carrying with me. Everyone in the dream knew where she was but wouldn't tell me.
That was the dream. Weird.
I remember hearing a psychologist in an interview discussing dreams. He said something very interesting about the meaning of dreams. This is a rough quote: "When you have a dream you can't understand, just remember, everyone in the dream, is you."
Well, I'm not made of TPE and don't plan on stripping anytime soon (outside the videos, of course). Maybe I'm unhappy with something in my life, or want to run away, metaphorically. Or, maybe dreams don't mean anything. The good news is, my Mikasa is still here with me. Interestingly, she is in fact damaged, though not in the ways she was in the dream. Maybe it doesn't mean anything.
One thing's for sure, she's my best girl, and always will be.